佚名

Anonymous

AreaderinFlorida，aarentlybruisedbysomeersonalexerience，writesintocomlain，

"IfIstealanickelsworthofmerchandise，Iamathiefandunished;butifIstealtheloveofanotherswife，Iamfree。

"

Thisisarevalentmisconcetioninmanyeolesminds—thatlove，likemerchandise，canbe

"stolen

"。Numerousstates，infact，haveenactedlawsallowingdamagesfor

"alienationofaffections

"。

Butloveisnotacommodity;therealthingcannotbebought，sold，tradedorstolen。Itisanactofthewill，aturningoftheemotions，achangeintheclimateoftheersonality。

Whenahusbandorwifeis

"stolen

"byanothererson，thathusbandorwifewasalreadyrieforthestealing，andwasalreadyredisosedtowardanewartner。The

"lovebandit

"wasonlytakingwhatwaswaitingtobetaken，whatwantedtobetaken。

Wetendtotreatersonslikegoods。Weevenseakofchildren

"belonging

"totheirarents。Butnobody

"belongs

"toanyoneelse。Childrenareentrustedtotheirarents，andiftheirarentsdonottreatthemroerly，thestatehasarighttoremovethemfromtheirarentstrusteeshi。

Mostofus，whenyoung，hadtheexerienceofasweetheartbeingtakenfromusbysomebodymoreattractiveandmoreaealing。Atthetime，wemayhaveresentedthisintruder—butaswegrewolder，werecognizedthatthesweethearthadneverbeenourstobeginwith。Itwasnottheintruderthat

"caused

"thebreak，butthelackofarealrelationshi。

Onthesurface，manymarriagesseemtobreakubecauseofa

"thirdarty

"。Thisis，however，asychologicalillusion。Theotherwomanortheothermanmerelyservesasaretextfordissolvingamarriagethathadalreadylostitsessentialintegrity。

佛罗里达州的一位读者写信来抱怨说：“如果我偷走了价值五分钱的商品，我就是一个贼，但是，如果我偷走了别人妻子的爱，却能安然无恙。”显然，他有悲伤的记忆。