佚名nonymous

InOctober1982，a25-year-oldwomanfinishedtheNewYorkCityMarathon。Nobigdeal—untilyoulearnthatLindaDownhascerebralalsyandwasthefirstwomanevertocomletethe26。2-mileraceoncrutches。Downfellhalfadozentimes，butketgoinguntilshecrossedthefinishline，11hoursaftershestarted。Herhandicalimitedherseedbutnotherdetermination。

HenryWadsworthLongfellowoncewrote:

"Greatistheartofbeginning，butgreatertheartisofending。

"Howniceitwouldbeifweallhadageniewhocouldhelusfinishwhatwebegin。Unfortunately，wedont。Butwhatwedohaveisadynamiccalleddisciline—whichextractsahighrice。FollowingoneofPaderewskiserformances，afansaidtohim，

"Idgivemylifetolaylikethat。

"Thebrilliantianistrelied，

"Idid。

"

Accomlishmentisoftendecetivebecausewedontseetheainanderseverancethatroducedit。Sowemaycredittheachieverwithbrains，brawnorluckybreaks，andletourselvesoffthehookbecausewefallshortinallthree。Notthatwecouldallbeconcertianistsjustbyexercisingenoughdisciline。Rather，eachofushasthemakingsofsuccessinsomeendeavor，butwewillachievethisonlyifwealyourwillsandworkatit。

Howcanweacquirestick-at-itiveness?Thereisnosimle，fastformula。ButIhavedeveloedawayofthinkingthathasrescuedmyownvacillatingwillmorethanonce。Herearethebasicelements:

"Dont

"ower

Thisisasimortantaswillower。TheancientChinesehilosoherMenciussaid，

"Menmustbedecidedonwhattheywillnotdo，andthentheyareabletoactwithvigorinwhattheyoughttodo。

"

Discilinemeanschoices

Everytimeyousayyestoagoalorobjective，yousaynotmanymore。Everyrizehasitsrice。Therizeistheyes;thericeistheno。IgorGorin，thenotedUkrainian-Americanbaritone，toldofhisearlydaysstudyingvoice。Helovedtosmokeaie，butonedayhisrofessorsaid，

"Igor，youwillhavetomakeuyourmindwhetheryouaregoingtobeagreatsinger，oragreatie-smoker，youcannotbeboth。

"Sotheiewent。

Delayedgratification

M。ScottPeck，M。D。，authorofthebest-sellerTheRoadLessTraveled，describesthistoolofdiscilineas

"arocessofschedulingtheainandleasureoflifeinsuchawayastoenhancetheleasurebymeetingandexeriencingtheainfirstandgettingitoverwith。

"

Thismightinvolveroutinedailydecisions—somethingassimleasskiingafavoritelate-nightTVshowandgettingtobedearly，tobewideawakeforameetingthenextmorning。Oritmightinvolvelonger-termresolves。Ayoungwidowwiththreechildrendecidedtoinvestherinsurancesettlementinacollegeeducationforherself。Sheconsideredtherealitiesofatightbudgetandlittlefreetime，buttheseseemedsmallsacrificesinreturnforthedoorsthatadegreewouldoen。Todaysheisahighlyaidfinancialconsultant。

Thesecretofsuchcommitmentisgettingastthedrudgeryandseeingthedelight。

"Thefactisthatmanyworthwhileendeavorsarentfun，

"sayssyndicatedradioandTVcommentatorMortCrim，

"True，allworkandnolaymakesJohnnyadullboy。Buttryingtoturneverythingwedointolaymakesforterriblefrustrations，becauselife—eventhemostrewardingone—includescircumstancesthatarentfunatall。Ilikemyjobasajournalist。Itsersonallysatisfying，bititisntalwaysfun。

"

Achievingabalance

Neverconfusediscilinewithrigidity。Perfectionisnottheaim;rather，strivefortheeaceofmindthatcomesfrombeinginchargeofyourself。

Mostofusneedinterludesinourworktotakeawalkoreatsnack—whateverrevivesandrefreshes。Yourbreathersdontneedtobelengthytoshakeoutthecobwebsandgivesomerelief。Suchrewardsactasincentivesforfinishingatask，aswellashelingyoutomaintainmomentum。

Truediscilineachievesabalanceofroducing，notdriving。Evendiscilineneedstobediscilined。

Self-develoment

Discilinedeolearehaiereolebecausetheyarefulfillinginnerotential。Awomanatoneofmyseminarstoldmeabouthersix-year-olddaughterwhoswamwithateamandracticedeverymorningforanhour，swimming2000to3000meters，sherelatedaconversationherdaughterhadwithafamilyfriend。

"Doyoulikeswimming?

"thefriendasked。

"Yes，Iloveit。

"

"Isitfun?”

"No!”

Thatsix-year-oldhadlearnedwhatmanyadultsneverexerience:thejoyofdiscilineandself-develoment。Unfortunately，theveryworddiscilineutsusoffbecauseitsoundsrestrictiveandunitive—likeatruantofficerstalkingustomakesurewetoetheline。Truediscilineisntonyourbackneedlingyouwithimeratives;itisatyourside，nudgingyouwithincentives。Whenyouunderstandthatdiscilineisself-caring，notself-castigating，youwontcringeatitsmention，butwillcultivateit。

CharleyBoswell，aformerUniversityofAlabamafootballstarwithhoesofarofessionalbaseballcareer，losthiseyesightinWorldWarII，butthatdidntstohim

"tobecometheNationalBlindGolfChamion17times。

"Hewasquotedassaying，

"InevercountwhatIvelost。IonlycountwhatIhaveleft。

"Thatisself-develoment—thatisdisciline。

Habit-changingstrategies

Manyaersonsdownfallcomesintryingtochangeabadhabitbyfocusingonanundesirablebehaviortorelaceit。

Countlesseoletellmetheywouldliketoeatbetterbutdontwantto

"giveu

"tastyfood。Ratherthanthinkingaboutwhattheycanthave，theyshouldthinkaboutwhattheycaneat。Fruitjuicewithsarklingmineralwaterisadelicioussubstituteforhigh-caloriesoftdrinks;snacksandcookiesrearedwithwholegrainsandfriedfruitsgivecandybarsgoodcometition。

Itisnteasytochangeoldhabits。Anoverweightwomancametomeduringaseminarandsaid，

"Imsoundiscilined。Icantsticktoadietandmyhouseisalwaysamess。Ifeellikeaslob。

"Itoldhershewasnttotallyundiscilined。

"Youmadeittothisconference。Youarriveromtlyateachsession，andyouareneatlydressed。

"Shealmostsmiled，andthenIadded，

"Theresrobablyareasonwhyyouhaventbeenabletoloseweightorgetyourhomeinorder。

"

Later，Ifoundouttherewasabigreason。Shewaswidowedayearbefore。Herhusbandhadbeenanalcoholicwhoverballyabusedherall24yearsoftheirmarriage。Itneveroccurredtoherthataoorself-imagewaskeeingherfromeffectingositivechanges。Withthisrealization，shetookthenextsteinbringingmorediscilinetoherlife—bygoingforcounseling。Meanwhile，someofherfriendsofferedtocometoherhouseandhelhercleanu，uttingherevenmoresolidlyonahabit-changingcourse。

Mindovermatter